I love you?/ Friday, April 03, 2009
finally after such along time i came back to blog. haha. alot of things happened during all this time.
maybe its time for me to be strong. to face all the problems i have created. i think i should learn to shoulder all the blames. and stop pushing them to others. seriously, i think i have to take back all the words i have said. i think i was wrong. she always said she was not good enuf for me. i think it is the other way round. i wasnt good enuf for her. i was always doing the wrong thing. people, stop thinking that its her fault. its i who have neglected her. if u want to blame anyone, its me u should blame. not her. i have been thinking about myself all along. and took her for granted. i was selfish, irresponsible, lazy, not doing what i was suppose to do, wasting time, wasting money, leaving her lonely, playful, thinking i was right, always blaming her and ................
so much more. i had so many chances. but i wasted it all. i am really tired. tired of myself. tired of my insensitivity. i now understand that every little thing counts. it really counts.
i watch american pie again. and i understood something. love issnt just a feeling. its something u do. every little thing u do. it really matters. with everything happening at the same time right now, i am not sure i can take it. but i have to learn. i have to grow up. stop being like a baby.and stop blaming every single little bad thing happening to me. its time to let everyone know. what a jerk i was. and saying all this doesnt matters anymore. what i have to do is start changing. change to a better person. change all my bad habits. but i am not sure if i can change my snoring. but i will change. not for the sake of anyone. okok. maybe for myself. its time. really. its time to change. and i shall not wait anymore.
Labels: after so long......
Where were you when skies were grey
12:22 PM <3
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